Winter wonderland?

This material is copyrighted by M. Kirby Moore.  Reproduction without permission is prohibited.

Tashi Delek (auspicious greetings),

How are you?  I ask because I believe we here in Va, are on route to receiving the most snow on record in 75 years (not all at once mind you).  So far, I think we are up to 60 inches with more on the way.  I recently started working at the local ski resort, again, and just in time for the flood gates of the cold hells to open up.  I am waiting tables.  This weekend I drove up the mountain early Friday morning to avoid the sleet (as previously I could not get up there during the sleet / snowfall) and later, I dug my car out Sunday afternoon.  On the mountain, we got 2+ feet of snow, and sleet, and hail, and freezing rain…  =^ )   Oh did I mention the sharp winds?  Waking up early this morning was well worth the blizzard-like conditions – the frosty, numb whiteness on the trees was accented by a crisp azure sky – wow!

For some ungodly reason, I volunteered to work every available shift while I was up there.  Long story short, my pockets are a little fatter after pulling 30 hours in 2.5 days.  However, there are aching muscles / bones in my lower body that I did not realize I possessed – I may need to invest in a hot tub to keep up this lifestyle.  Or see what is in store for me come April.

Out of the 16 days I have driven to and worked at Wintergreen, at least half of them have involved precarious driving conditions – if it isn’t frozen precipitation, then sometimes clouds drift in and seem to camp out on the roads.  I broke my ice scraper the first night on an inch of frozen rain and it has not gotten much better.  But!  For some reason I cannot fathom, I feel compelled to stick with it until the end of ski season.

At the opening, I say Tashi Delek, because we are in the final week of the Tibetan calendar and Sunday (Valentine’s Day?) is Losar – the Tibetan New Year.  And of course I have to work!  Haha – no celebrating for Kirby!  It is the Tibetan custom to confess and purify any non-virtuous actions from the past year now and then on Saturday Tibetans clean – house, shrine, monastery, etc.  Then, in the first month, there are many days of festivities (at least before China annexed the Tibetan plateau).

With that, I bid you Losar Tashi Delek Pun Tsum Tsog – the once-a-year, auspicious new year well wishes!  I hope you are warm and happy wherever you are.  (My Tibetan transliteration is poor and I am too lazy to go look it up at the moment).

Body Talk

This material is copyrighted by M. Kirby Moore.  Reproduction without permission is prohibited.  Dr. Veltheim is the founder and creator of BodyTalk, I am merely a humble practitioner of five of his potent techniques.  Visit here for more information: <http://www.bodytalksystem.com>

I am writing this post due to the growing number of fascinating and cathartic experiences my clients describe while receiving this potent, supplemental modality.  I say supplemental because I have merely gone through the first level of this extensive and comprehensive body of work, therefore in my practice, it has to be supplemental.  Although there are a few clients who might be content to receive BodyTalk techniques for an entire session.

What is BodyTalk?  see the above link for their description of the modality.

How does a practitioner apply BodyTalk to a session?  Personally, I tend to intuit when one or more of the BodyTalk techniques will come in handy.  In general, I find that when someone is very sensitive to energy work, they are more receptive and feel the resulting shifts from BodyTalk.  Other people might be less sensitive and they are more receptive to mechanical forms of Cranio Sacral therapy for instance.

In BodyTalk Access, the workshop I was trained in, there are 5 techniques taught: Cortices, Switching, Hydration, Body Chemistry and Reciprocals.  These are some of the foundational BodyTalk techniques and they come up fairly often, even when the practitioner has the full BodyTalk training (and many many further tools from the BodyTalk repertoire).  Cortices works to balance the hemispheres and individual, specific cortices of the brain.  This is a very beneficial technique for calming someone after a traumatic event, or for calming the body if there has been an injury (I used it when I sprained my ankle with very positive results).  Switching helps to calm the kidneys and the adrenal glands – if we are typicaly Mercurial types, this is a great technique to sooth the system and relax and immediate worries.  Hydration helps the body receive and integrate water molecules.  I also suspect there are deeper psycho-spiritual ramifications to this technique (like the deep moisture of authentic compassion and loving-kindness).  Body Chemistry is a potent technique which helps to aid the body in identifying and removing toxins, allergens and anything poisonous to the body – I have had some detoxifying experiences using it with clients – see below.  Finally, last but certainly not least, Reciprocals are an incredibly potent technique which basically puts the body’s connective tissue back into alignment.  Reciprocals takes the longest out of all five techniques as it is very comprehensive – connecting the limbs to the torso, the head to the shoulders and torso and urging the pelvis, spine and base of the skull to come into alignment.  There are many benefits to this practice, some of which I will mention below.

What are some of the experiences clients have described?  Someone who is very sensitive to energy-work usually has significant shifts from BodyTalk techniques.  One client in particular responds with rapid calming and settling to reciprocals, cortices and body chemistry.  It is almost as if she is, by far, an energetic being having a human experience, and this work provides a direct link to her energetic body.

Another client wanted to receive all five tools in a session, which I was happy to provide.  She was interested in the potential healing shifts, along with being introduced to the work.  However, she called me the next morning and said, “Kirby!  What did you do yesterday??!!”  I asked her what she was talking about, to which she asked about the session.  I told her I had only done what we were trained to do in the Access workshop.  She then said, “I am excited because this morning was the first time in twenty years that I woke up without pain!”  Wow!  That is pretty exciting – I had not realized it, but she said her jaw really bothered her but that morning it was pain free.  She then went on to take at least three levels of BodyTalk and she is still studying it.  That was two years ago…   :^)

Finally, when I was doing the actualy BodyTalk Access workshop, my partner, who is a friend of mine, and I did Body Chemistry with each other.  He is also a sensitive fellow, someone who can see the aura and observe shifts in his client’s energetic body.  As I did Body Chemistry with him, I started to notice that he was perspiring more than usual.  Then, soon thereafter, a pungent odor arose, which I had smelled before, and one that I associate with someone detoxifying.  I asked him about both of these things, and he made a curious excuse about needing to eat lunch.  Personally I am certain that he was detoxing and that Body Chemistry was a major reason for his doing so.  Talk about a direct experience!  Wow.

Charlottesville Ratnashri Sangha (Drikung Kagyu)

This is a post that is dedicated to sharing information about the Charlottesville Ratnashri Sangha, which is a small group of sincere Tibetan Buddhist practitioners which gathers weekly.  The C’ville Ratnashri Sangha is a not-for-profit group that hosts teachers and desires to contribute to the maintenance of the Buddha-Dharma in the West.  The group comes together every other Sunday evening for a discussion group, which is open to the public.  At present the C’ville Sangha is been discussing one of Dilgo Khyentse’s books.  If you would like to get on their email list or to learn more, leave a comment here and I am happy to connect you.

Ratnashri is the Sanskrit name for the founder of the Drikung Kagyu lineage of Tibetan Buddhism – Jigten Sumgon – and Khenchen Rinpoche, Konchog Gyaltsen recommended we use that name.  Khenchen is the founder of the Tibetan Meditation Center in Frederick, Maryland, and the C’ville Sangha is a smaller, sister-Sangha of that center.  See the link to the Center’s website to the right.

The C’ville group sponsors teachers to come to C’ville, several times per year, to teach on various subjects related to Tibetan Buddhism.  Here are some of the teachers that have been sponsored and some of what they have taught.  Khenchen Rinpoche, Konchog Gyaltsen, Drupon Thinley Ningpo, Khenpo Tsultrim Tenzin, Khenpo Chophel, and Dr. Hun Lye have come to town in the past to lead weekend teachings – ranging from meditation practice (Shamatha), to the Jewel Ornament of Liberation (a book that contains a summary of the complete path to Buddhahood) as well as to bestow empowerments and blessings of various Buddhist deities and protectors, including Green Tara, Vajrayogini and Mahakala.

The next teacher scheduled to come to Charlottesville is Drupon Thinley Ningpo, the Retreat Master of the Tibetan Meditation Center in Maryland.  Drupon is tentatively scheduled to teach on the weekend of April 17th and 18th, 2010 and he will be discussing the practice of Guru Yoga (one of the foundational practices of Tibetan Buddhism).

Om Mani Padme Hung Hrih

Living Metaphors

braving mountain – hopping in iron horse and driving up, slowly, carefully, ascending great heights

passing signs of bear warnings, driving up into and across sleet / ice line, diving into fast paced environment

much courage and bravery are required, or ignorance of where one is treading

drifting off, wading through a field of others’ suffering, alert mind fading

gazing out window, sleet and ice at least an inch thick

remembering Garchen Rinpoche’s advice – “to allow the ice around our hearts to melt”

Recently I have started working at the local ski resort in a restaurant.  There are some pros and cons to doing this, but it feels good to be mixing it up again – meeting many people, practicing humility, interacting with various types and most importantly, making some much needed $$ (I used to be in the food and beverage industry prior to 2006).  However, in spite of taking a “regular person’s job” as a waiter, I am not able to escape the subtleties of life.  That is, when metaphors come alive, and little things – like plumbing problems, freezing rain, thick fog, flooding, etc – keep coming up to grab my attention.

Down in the valley and in the city, there has been no inclement weather (yet, in the past week), but on the mountain, I have had to chisel my way into my car twice, and then I broke an ice scraper last night trying to free my windshield of a thick layer of frozen rain and sleet…  This has happened two nights in a row.  And it is just my second night of working!  Oh, that is not to mention the soupy, mesmerizing fog I drive through to get down off the mountain.

You could say I took a job in a place that is known for its rough weather.  And that would be quite true.  You might also suggest that it is just melodramatic timing.  And that seems to be the case as well.  But I also wonder about the “melt the ice around your heart” statement and how there has been so much freezing rain up there.  So far, on the job, I am doing an excellent job of keeping a low profile, maintaining inner neutral and saying something appropriate (truly compassionate) when someone who does not even know me starts talking about their suffering – nope sorry, I do not need to hear about it – at least not yet.  Maintaining boundaries is a good practice, especially for an empathic Neptunian / Piscean type like myself.

In the midst of many changes, I am feeling some angst.  I believe this inner drive has to do with practicing more, and as I attempt to honor my heart teacher’s recommendations, it is my intention to melt the ice around my heart.  It’s like some spiritual astrology books say, “eggs cannot hatch in the refrigerator!”  We need to introduce some lasting warmth and kindness into our lives, analyze our reactions and our mental habits and let go of that which no longer serves us – gently and at an appropriate pace.

My personal, provocative statement for this year is: may all sentient beings pierce through the veils of ignorance which prevent a limitless flow of compassion.  To me, having to come down the mountain through veils of thick fog is reminiscent of living this provocative statement.  I’m not saying the metaphors are that direct and instant for me, maybe when on retreat, but it is fascinating nonetheless.

Finally, between September 2009 and New Years 2010, I have been in buildings / apartments where three separate plumbing problems have occurred.  There was flooding involved in two of those cases and once it was rather drastic.  At the time, I was involved in a relationship where I was living out an old addictive pattern (among other things).  You might say I was flooding my body with the “fight-or-flight” adrenaline, as I was feeling shock and severe contraction.  I’m not sure why, but sometimes, I believe that if our system is in the midst of enormous changes (say transiting Uranus is crossing our Natal Sun), then it is good to rest way down and avoid many of the more normal human behaviors – when appropriate of course.  Long story short, the flooding / plumbing metaphor had to be drilled into me on several occasions as I just did not seem to listen or contemplate its meaning at first.

Practicing kindness to self is very beneficial, as well as other tools for self care.  Allowing the inner heat of authentic meditation to gradually melt the icy edges of the heart is also beneficial (not that I know anything about this).  Knowing yourself and your patterns is helpful to making wise decisions.  And so is being aware of the living messages – however nature gets them to you, open your mind and your heart to the possibility, and you may be amazed at what follows.

January update – keeping our feet on the ground

Does it seem like the frequency of this world  (city, planet, universe, etc) is increasing?  Or am I the only one?  Whatever the case may be, many of my clients are also naming similar elevated states of consciousness / awareness (or anxiety).  On the other hand, maybe my system is simply heightened and processing more, and as a result I am drawing people into my environment who are experiencing similar growth experiences (sssttrreettcchh!!).  It might just be the tail end of this current Uranus conjunct my Sun period (which seems to be a little heavier due to Saturn’s presence in the equation).

I am writing this post to inform and as a reminder that we need activities which help keep our feet on the ground.  It literally helps to check in with our feet occasionally – in some traditions, the feet are the source of wisdom (the connection to Mother Earth – who could be more wise?).  For me, as I continue to study the Tibetan language, albeit slowly, gradually and sometimes with teeth-pulling resistance, I realize this pursuit of a foreign language helps to ground my mind.

To wax astrological for a moment, as a Sun sign Pisces with strong Neptune, Pluto and Uranian influences in my birth chart, I certainly had a tendency to dissociate (either drift a little out of my body or just remain in my head – and not be conscious of anything below the neck).  When I am overwhelmed with too many responsibilities, even today, if my plate fills too rapidly without my being mindful of it, I can revert to old patterns.  However I am improving, which I am happy to admit, and I catch on to the subtle sensations or warning signs that my body / mind send me if this starts to happen.  But I have had to work hard to deal with and maintain the little (important) mundane details of life.  I find it is the daily details of studying Tibetan and maintaining a meditation practice that help to keep me grounded, no matter how much resistance I encounter – I just gently and mindfully push through it.

I also find exercise to be very beneficial – getting the blood flowing and the fluids circulating helps to unwind physical as well as mental tension.  Whatever your situation, I would recommend exploring and discovering some activity that encourages grounded presence.  If you want a suggestion, I would recommend receiving bodywork from a qualified practitioner and / or begin to learn Zapchen Somatics – find a quality teacher and dive in.  (You might consider my workshops).

Actually I started this post with a prelude of the Earth’s quickening, but I want to wrap it up by saying that Metta Reiki can help to teach people tools to discover their own pace.  In Metta Reiki workshops, I encourage people to slow down – discover a pace that is natural, spontaneous and comfortable.  If we are not careful, we look around us and we can easily get overwhelmed – people are delusional at times, there are major crises all over the globe, our family might be dealing with intense challenges.  In my workshops, I challenge people to slow down and determine their own needs and the pace that is most comfortable to them.  Sure, there are problems in the world – there are problems in our cities and possibly in our backyards.  But if we do not slow down and do our (inner) personal growth work, how can expect things to improve in the outer world?

In conclusion, please take a deep breath…  Right now…  And let it out with a long sigh.  Maybe repeat this process for as long as feels comfortable.  It is going to be okay.  Choose activities and build in tools which help to keep your feet on the ground.  And most importantly, build in some restful “me-time” in your life.

With that, have a good Wednesday.

a bit of Metta, workshops post-poned

Hello Blogging World,  Thank you for reading!  And of course this material, where appropriate, is copyrighted by M. Kirby Moore.  Please ask permission before reproducing any of it.

At the Mani Drupchen, I had plenty of time to think about my New Year’s resolutions and my provocative statement to hold in my heart throughout this coming year.  I am not sure what day it was, but I came up with a sentence that I feel is quite potent.  I was pondering the states of compassion and kindness which seemed to arise while in retreat.  I wanted to be able to sustain that level of potency even when I left retreat, but judging from previous experience, I was not sure I could handle this tall order.

Therefore, my provocative statement for this new year is along the lines of:  May (I and) all sentient beings pierce the veils of ignorance which obscure the flow of limitless compassion (ASAP).

There you go!  For me, that is at least a year long process, heh…  Actually it is probably a 5,000 lifetime goal but I am slowly working on it.

Also, on a separate note, I have taken a job which will delay my planned workshops.  I will be re-scheduling in the spring and / or summer, and I might also look into leading workshops in Va Beach as well as Maryland.

Questions answered about Metta Reiki

This material is copyrighted by M. Kirby Moore.  Reproduction without permission is prohibited.

Hello Readers,

In this post, it is my intention to clarify what Metta Reiki is.  I hope you all do not mind a few plugs scattered here and there, but considering I am self-employed, in addition to maintaining an informative blog, this is what I do “at work.”  There have been many hits on the Metta Reiki page of my blog, in fact, if I were to speculate, I would say at least a quarter of the blog’s traffic views that page.

It is my intention to cover these topics: 1) as a student of Reiki, I would like to know more about Metta Reiki; 2) what benefits might I receive from exploring Metta Reiki?; 3) I have my own healing facilitation practice, how can I incorporate Metta Reiki into my practice?; 4) What can I expect in a class / workshop?

For a brief overview, please see the page “Metta Reiki.”

I have been very blessed with profound teachers – Tibetan Lamas (some well known, others who are / were secret yogis), process-oriented bodywork instructors, traditional Reiki Masters, practitioners of Indigenous rituals, a Sufi Master, all my heart teachers and multiple, astrologers / authors.  There are many more, and I am very grateful for them all.  It is my intention that what I offer please my teachers.  Out of all of them, ones who taught me how to slow down appropriately and mindfully, and practice kindness to self are perhaps the most profound, and that is what I attempt to emulate in offering Metta Reiki.

My passion is in introducing people to inner resources of loving-kindness, compassion and potency (within us all).  Hugh Milne has a quote “The Heart of Listening,” that goes, “we can never go too deep, but we can go too fast.”  Through practicing Biodynamic Craniosacral therapy and traditional Reiki, along with attending many highly-respected Tibetan Lamas and other realized teachers, plus maintaining my own Buddhist meditation practice, I have experience with Metta practices, (energetic) field dynamics, many tools for self care and a practice of compassion and skillful means.

Metta Reiki is a fusion of Tibetan Buddhist practices, simple exercises for well-being (primarily from Zapchen Somatics), Compassionate Communication and traditional Usui Reiki.  One of my primary intentions is to go slow enough to allow for graceful integration and to develop a comprehensive understanding of what is possible when we rest down into our heart and listen to what it has to share.  Tools for appropriate self care – energetic balancing, physical relaxing, mental calming, etc – are considered vital and are taught accordingly.  These tools come from a number of modalities, including Craniosacral Therapy, Tibetan Buddhism, BodyTalk, traditional Reiki, Zapchen Somatics and Spiritual Processing.  As I mentioned above, I have been very blessed with my teachers, and I try to share the most potent tools for self care which they taught me.

The benefits one receives from exploring Metta Reiki are plenty and diverse.  First, you slow down enough to practice kindness to yourself – to truly check in and ask, “What are my needs?  Are they being met?  Are they appropriate?  How can I shift my lifestyle to accommodate my authentic needs?”  Second, students are introduced to techniques which they can use both with themselves and with others for rapid relaxation and subsequent healing.  In Craniosacral Therapy, there are states known as still-points where we can rest so deeply that our body is in a state of relaxation beyond that of sleep.  Over time and with practice, there are techniques that can get a diligent practitioner to these states without needing many bodywork sessions.  (Keep in mind I would never recommend against receiving bodywork from a qualified practitioner, but receiving dozens of sessions might be pricey.)  Finally, Metta Reiki is a great way to start one’s inner journey toward self-discovery and practicing kindness to self.  It is non-sectarian, despite there being some meditations from Buddhism, and I do not promote any religion over another.  In fact, I offer wisdom which has been passed down from numerous traditions.

If you maintain your own healing facilitation practice, then you definitely want to explore Metta Reiki.  If you find yourself burnt out after seeing many clients in a week, or if there are some weeks when it is difficult to motivate yourself, then this workshop will provide you with tools to shed new light on quality self care.  How can we shift our ways of relating to others to be more appropriate?  How can we develop equanimity to better handle any situation we may come across?  Metta Reiki provides tools to answer and improve on both of these questions.

In a typical Metta Reiki workshop, one can expect to be in good company.  It is my intention to have participants who are open to growth and transformation, who are willing to look at some potentially uncomfortable aspects of their lives with the purpose of re-patterning and moving forward from those old paradigms.  My ideal demographic will be between ages 17 and 77, of diverse backgrounds and cultures, who are willing to shift conditioned patterns which no longer serve and to move toward patterns of kindness, openness and wholesome enjoyment of life.  Over time, and after completing Level Three and Four, it is my intention for workshop participants to grow to understand the healing process, both in themselves and in others (their potential clients).

Please see an upcoming post about the individual Levels of Metta Reiki and what one can expect to come away with after completing them.

I am leading workshops again – Metta Reiki and Embodiment

This material is copyrighted by M. Kirby Moore.  Reproduction without permission is prohibited.

I am feeling full and refreshed after having returned from the recent Mani Drupchen retreat at the Tibetan Meditation Center.  See the previous posts for more info on that.  Having rejuvenated parts of myself and cleared much of my previously full psychic plate (at least for the moment), I am excited to be offering several classes and workshops in the upcoming months.  I am passionate about Cultivating Mindful Embodiment and Metta Reiki.  The first level of Metta Reiki is known as An Introduction to Self Care.

To contact me about any of these upcoming workshops and classes or with questions, use mkirbymoore the “at” symbol gmail “dot” com.  I normally do not put such shameless plugs into my blog, but at the moment, this is how I am earning my living.  Thank you for reading!

Cultivating Mindful Embodiment:

Sometime in the Spring, I plan to offer this dynamic series of classes:  I taught this over the fall of 2009 and it was enjoyed by all of the participants.  It is a fusion of simple somatic exercises for well-being, basic meditation practices from Tibetan Buddhism and techniques to explore experience of the self as body, energy and awareness.  This series is a unique, joyful and gentle approach to learning basic meditation practice.  This series is by donation – the suggested amount is $25 per session but I do not want financial constraints to prevent anyone from attending.  It is a small group so let me know if you are interested.  I request a $25 non-refundable deposit to reserve your space.  Half the proceeds will go toward projects at the (up and coming) Phuntsok Darje Ling retreat center in Frederick Md (associated with the TMC).  Visit http://drikungtmc.org for more information.

Metta Reiki Level One – “An Introduction to Self Care” Workshops:

This modality is my personal creation, and as with any new creation, there are ingredients from that which influences me.  The parents of this new child are Tibetan Buddhist practices, Compassionate Communication, traditional Usui Reiki, Zapchen Somatics, and Craniosacral therapy.  Many of the primary Reiki practices have been maintained, to which I add a grounded, step-by-step process for learning and embodying awareness and for resting in alignment.  Techniques for self-care (practicing kindness to self) are considered vital and are taught accordingly.  Metta is a Sanskrit word meaning “loving-kindness.”  I plan to lead this workshop in April or May of 2010.  I have been leading small groups through these workshops for more than two years now.

I have more detailed fliers I am happy to send you if you request them (for either or both workshops).  Remember, my email is mkirbymoore “at” symbol gmail “dot” com.

I also offer individual bodywork sessions in Charlottesville and Spiritual Astrology interpretations locally or over the phone.  Thank you again for reading and have a great day.

2nd Annual Mani Drupchen – completion

This material is copyrighted by M. Kirby Moore.  Reproduction without permission is prohibited.

In this post: the last day of the Drupchen, my final thoughts on the inspiring and clarifying week and precious words from the prayers we were saying on a daily basis.

1/2/10 – As I mentioned in previous posts, we ended the Drupchen a day early due to a slight plumbing problem.  Therefore, the lamas packed a 3 hour empowerment, lunch, the mandala dissolution and naga puja into this bitterly cold day.  Khenpo Tsultrim was the Vajra Master for the empowerment, and it was a beautiful ceremony.  His English is improving, so he explained all the components and visualizations with patience and expertise.  He also continued to look to Hun and I for translation assistance, which I feel a little guilty about.  I have been studying the Tibetan language for two and a half years, and I am only starting to get into the Dharma literary Tibetan sections.  Alas.

The empowerment was three hours long because it is a full empowerment, despite being for the Four Armed Chenrezig.  All four empowerments were contained within it and we visualized ourselves, almost like a higher yoga tantra (not that I know much about this stuff).  There were pictures for every aspect of the empowerment and Khenpo explained what each picture symbolized – there was the clothing of Chenrezig, his retinue (consort, son, daughter, the Five Buddha Family Lords, etc) and more.  At least forty people showed up to receive the empowerment.

We then had a brief lunch and then the mandala dissolution happened very quickly.  Khenpo, with vajra in hand, ran his hand through the sand at each of the four “gates.”  Then the other ordained members helped to move the sand to the middle and then into a crystal bowl-like container.  I was the designated photographer, so I was clicking shots around and above everyone else (thank goodness I am so tall).  I got some good pictures.  The lamas came outside, into the freezing weather (it was 15 degrees on the mountain that day, not counting the wind chill) and then they were escorted to the river, about twenty minutes away.  Unfortunately I was coming down with something, a brief flu-like episode, so I did not feel up to standing out in the sub-arctic temperatures for the naga puja.  However I have heard that it went well – although, at those temps. I am hoping it went faster than last year (which was almost two hours in length).

As far as further thoughts on the Mani Drupchen, I am definitely planning to attend next year’s retreat (intensive).  As one of the assistants (managers), I felt like I was able to navigate through the chatter of the living room (at meal times) and stay focused on the practice and the retreat.  I was feeling the need to drop in deep – having pushed myself through another semester at UVa, so I did not join in much of the pleasant conversations going on during meals.  I had a little name tag which said, “Noble Silence Please.”  And that was good – I only felt the need to wear it a couple of days.  Next year I am sitting away from the sliding glass doors however – the cold draft coming off of them forced my kidneys to work overtime, producing strange dreams and visions, along with making me wonder why I was so cold all the time.

I felt my heart shift from a tight, self-orientation to an open, warm, expanded vastness.  I went from feelings of revulsion and being harsh to myself to attraction and being compassionate with myself – quite a polar shift.  I allowed some sunlight into the dark crevasses of my shadowy cellars and I made a deeper connection with emptiness and the Dharma in general.  I became more at ease with my vulnerabilities, slowed down my process of self- and other-judgment, and I established some inner stability.  And most importantly, I became a slightly better human being.

As one of my friends said, who has some experience on 90 day retreats, “when reality starts to bend, that’s when you know you are detaching yourself from the traditional ego structures.”  This was very reassuring because that definitely happened to me – although now that I am back in life, I am struggling to find a good balance of practice and living so as to maintain what I have discovered and not fall back into the egoic patterns of action / reaction. 

Khenpo, when asked about a possible desire to marry a Westerner in order to gain easier citizenship, responded instantaneously with, “I am focusing on my future lives!  Why would I want to do that?  I am surviving for this life and focused on next life.”  It was a great answer.  (Not that there is any possibility of it coming true.)  He also mentioned something that I was glad to be reminded of.  He said the Buddha lives, breathes and thinks every action for the benefit of sentient beings – if a breathe did not benefit sentient beings, the Buddha would not have breathed it.

Finally, a series of lines from the Supplication Prayer to Chenrezig which we said several times per day during the retreat – I find it to be very beautiful: Please bless my confused body that does not understand the dual appearance of holder and held, and so grasps at a self, to obtain a stable generation stage that moves as the illusory vajra body and completely appears as the uncontaminated form kayas.  Please bless me to obtain realization of the completion stage so that all phenomena, bound by confused ignorance mind, permanently arise as the appearance of the Dharmakaya, luminous, self-appearing, self-liberating, the union of bliss and emptiness.

I take this to mean that everything in this world is like a dream.  Dreams are like dreams, within the larger dream.  View everything as illusory and practice the Dharma – allow non-attachment to arise as you familiarize yourself with emptiness and interdependence.

Have a lovely January!

2nd Annual Mani Drupchen – Day Seven plus

This material is copyrighted by M. Kirby Moore.  Reproduction without permission is prohibited.

This is a brief addition to the previous post – about the surprising event which occurred Friday evening.

1/1/10 – continued – The Mani Drupchen was originally scheduled to have the empowerment on the first Sunday morning, with Gyabra Tritsab Rinpoche and then it was going to culminate on the following Sunday with dedication, dissolution of the mandala, distribution of the mani pills (Tibetan medicine pills) and the naga puja at the river where they pour the sand mandala into the waters.  However, due to Rinpoche’s visa issues and not being able to come to the United States at this time, the empowerment was pushed back to the end of the retreat.

Then, as we were practicing on Friday evening, there was a bit of chaos as one of the drain pipes in the basement backed up.  It took some discernment but it was quickly determined that no more water or waste could be drained.  So there were about 20 people at the center with the intention of spending the night when we were told that we could only use limited (slight trickle) water at the sinks and no toilets.  There was a variety of reactions – some people were obviously disturbed by this information, while several people slept through all the commotion.

It was decided to make Saturday the last day, as we only had a port-a-potty for forty to fifty people (there were many people there to attend the empowerment).  Therefore, the empowerment, the mandala dissolution and the naga puja happened on the same day.  I will save that beautiful description for my next post however, as I want to mention some fascinatingly comical facts.

I do not know what kind of karma I have, but recently I have been experiencing some rather bizarre situations involving plumbing.  For instance, in my basement apartment, over the past few months, I have had to deal with two separate pipe-backing-up events or some minor flooding as it were.  Therefore, I had some experience with plumbing problems before the little incident occurred at the center.

What was strange however, was that the only person’s belongings who got really soaked, was me.  I had my personal food and my overnight bag next to the washing machine, and that is where the outlet for the backed-up water was.  It was kind of funny.  There is this plumbing problem, with a little bit of water spilling over – it was surreal actually.  I think my being on retreat made it much easier to take, but I am really pondering what metaphor the universe is trying to get me to observe – or if I just have some strange waste-water karma at the moment (transiting Uranus is crossing my natal Sun as we speak).